മനസ്സിൻ്റെ ഇടവഴികൾ

 ഒരോ ഇടവഴിയും

ഒരന്വേഷണത്തിൻ്റെയടയാളമാണ്

ഇതിനുമപ്പുറമെന്തോ ഉണ്ടെന്നും

അതെന്താണെന്നറിയാനുമുള്ള

ജനതികാവേശം

ഒരിക്കലുമൊടുങ്ങാത്ത സാഹസികത

പുതിയയിടങ്ങൾ കണ്ടെത്താനുള്ള വെമ്പൽ

കാടും പടലും മാറ്റി

 വഴിത്തീർക്കാനുള്ള വ്യഗ്രത

ഇതിനപ്പുറമെന്തെന്ന അവസാനിക്കാത്ത ആരായൽ

ഇന്ന്, വിഹഗ വീക്ഷണങ്ങളിൽ

എൻ്റെ അന്വേഷണം വഴി മുട്ടി നിൽക്കുന്നു.

അടച്ചിട്ട മുറിക്കുള്ളിലിരുന്നെനിക്ക് യന്ത്രത്തിലൂടെ

കാടകവും, കടലാഴവും

ഗിരിശ്ര്യംഗവും മരുപരപ്പും കാണാം.

എനിക്ക് വെട്ടിത്തെളിക്കാൻ ഒരിടവഴിയില്ല,

കണ്ടെത്താൻ പുതിയൊരിടമില്ല.

ഇടവഴികൾ പെരുവഴികളാകുമ്പോൾ,

എത്ര നടന്നാലും തീരാത്ത

മനസ്സിൻ്റെ ഊടുവഴികളിലേക്ക്,

നിഗൂഡതകളിലേക്ക്

ഞാൻ യാത്രത്തിരിക്കുന്നു

വീട് പണിയുമ്പോൾ

വീട് പണിയുമ്പോൾ വേണം,

കിടപ്പുമുറിക്കും തീൻ മുറിക്കുമൊപ്പം

സന്തോഷത്താലും, ദുഖത്താലും

നിശബ്ദമായി കരയാനൊരു മുറി

മുഖം മിനുക്കാനാവാത്ത

ഉള്ളു മാത്രം കാട്ടുന്ന കണ്ണാടി

ചിറകൊതുക്കുന്ന ശലഭത്തിന്

പറന്നിറങ്ങാൻ സദാ തുറന്ന ജാലകം

വേട്ടാളന് കൂട് കൂട്ടാൻ

ആരുമിരിക്കാത്ത കസേര

പരസ്പരം കുത്തി നോവിക്കാൻ

മുനകൂർത്ത വാക്കുകൾ നിറഞ്ഞ ആവനാഴി

പിന്നീട്, മുറിവുണക്കാൻ

സ്നേഹ ലേപനം വളർത്തുന്ന ഉദ്യാനം

വായിക്കാത്ത പുസ്തകങ്ങളടക്കി

വെക്കാൻ ചില്ലിട്ട കൂട്

തുലാവർഷ പെയ്ത്തിൽ

ഉള്ളിലെ കലക്കങ്ങളെല്ലാം

ഒഴിഞ്ഞൊഴുകാൻ ഒരു ചാല്

ചിതലുകേറാൻ ഒരു ചുമർ

ചിലന്തിക്ക് വലനെയ്യാൻ ഒരു മൂല

ഒരു കോണിലൊതുങ്ങാത്ത,

കരിന്തിരിയുടെ പുകയേൽക്കാത്ത

ചിത്രങ്ങളിൽ നിന്നും വിഗ്രഹങ്ങളിൽ നിന്നും

 വിമുക്തനായി തൂണിലും തുരുമ്പിലും

 നിറയുന്ന ദൈവത്തിന് ഒരുമ്മറപ്പടി

പൊട്ടിച്ചിതറിയ ഓർമകൾ

സൂക്ഷിക്കാനൊരളുക്ക്

ഇരുട്ടിൻ്റെ മറവിലെ ദ്രുത

ചുംബനത്തിനൊരു ഗോവണിച്ചുവട്

ഒടുവിൽ, വെള്ളപുതച്ചുറങ്ങാൻ

തൊടിയിൽ നട്ടുനന്നച്ചു വളർത്തിയ വാഴയില

മുഖം മൂടാൻ രക്തം ചൊരിയാത്ത മൂന്നു പിടി മണ്ണ്

കരിങ്കാക്കയായ് വന്നുണ്ണാൻ

സ്നേഹത്തിൻ്റെ തിലോദകം ചേർത്തുരുട്ടിയ

ഒരുരുള്ള ചോറ് .

LASSI AND PEPSI STORY

The day at the office was stressful and draining. The company had introduced a new compensation package for the employees, giving more importance to long term saving. Company was contributing a significant amount for those employees who are willing to remain with the organization for a longer period.

The employees, as you could imagine, were not happy. The new generation is not bothered about long term savings. They need a fatter “take home” package. I tried to reason out with them that even in this case they will be eventually taking these benefits home, only difference being they will get it a bit later. They were not convinced. I can’t blame them completely. They have their EMI’S and other pressures to take care of. In the age of instant gratification, a long- term benefit is not preferred.

Even I was like them, spending whatever I earned. It was some wise advice from few experts which changed my outlook. Fortunately, I realized that it is difficult for me to save from my earnings of my own. It was better for the company to do it forcefully.

So, it was with that heavy heart that I walked into the small restaurant, near our office, for lunch. My appetite was not great. I ordered something very light and just to distract myself from the official thoughts I started looking around.

That is when I noticed five old ladies sitting at a table besides me. They were all in their late seventies. They all were seriously pouring over the menu. That ignited my curiosity and against my culture I decided to sneak -peek into their conversation. Initially, it was difficult to follow them. From the bits and pieces, I realized that they all have come to collect their monthly pension from the treasury. Years back they were working together and they take this as an opportunity to meet each other every month. They come from different places, but they meet at this restaurant, have something to eat and munch on their sweet old memories. 

They spoke softly, but excitedly. There was a sense of calmness on their face at the same time they were eager. While going through the menu seriously, they were updating each other with all the happenings since they met last time.

“My son is asking me to give him the authorization to collect the pension. He is asking why I should take all these pains to travel every month”, one of them was sharing. “But he can never imagine how much I enjoy these trips. “, she concluded.

“Pension is a real savior, it puts some money in our hand and also an opportunity to see you all at least once a month”, another one chipped in.

“I used to hate when they deduct money from salary for pension. Only when I got the first pension, I realized how wrong I was”, the third person commented.

As I sat there, listening to them, their energy and vibrancy slowly spread on to me.

 By then they had gone through the menu thoroughly. I thought that by now they must have known the whole menu by-heart.

I was curious to know their selection and what they selected bowled me over. After all those laborious scanning they had selected- Lassi and Pepsi!!! Lassi I could understand, but Pepsi?! It made me more curious.

Again, there was a discussion. “We will have lassi today, my stomach is not feeling well”, someone suggested and all others agreed immediately. By then I was completely immersed in them. Their enthusiasm was so contagious that I forgot completely about my office and the discussions.

Then came one of the most positive statements I have ever heard in my life. Keeping aside the menu card one of them said,” yes, we will have lassi today and next month we will have Pepsi”. Her words fizzled out and drenched me like a fountain.

Imagine her positivity. She is so sure about them meeting next month and had also decided what they are going to have when they meet.

 Just a few hours of discussion at office had made me drained and exhausted. While these septuagenarians, having gone through all grinding of life, are so hopeful about their future and energetic to live long into the future. They are now reaping the benefits of what they sowed years ago.

Suddenly, the otherwise insipid food, felt tasty.

Then it dawned on me that now I have a beautiful story to tell my team.

I shared the story with the team and they all got related to it immediately. It became one of our favorite stories and we called it the LASSI OR PEPSI story. Whenever we got stuck between a long-term benefit and a short-term gain we remembered this story.

Later on, when my energy levels were low, I always chose and savored the lassi from the life’s menu and kept the frizzling Pepsi for the future.

How long will you stare at your wife?

 

 

The Chairman and MD of L&T, one of the largest business conglomerates in India, shares a rather absurd and shocking view in one of his interviews. He, nonchalantly, says that he regrets he cannot make employees work even on Sundays and, to add to the absurdity, goes to the extent of asking, " how long will you stare at your wife’s face". According to him, it seems, employees should work 90 hours a week.

These provocative statements, cleverly covered under the wraps off so called, " complete dedication", and " sacrifice for the growth of the country" slogans, clearly shows a shift in our economic, cultural, moral and ethical values, where human rights are given lesser attention.

How many hours an employee should work is an ongoing debate. While we debate on this topic, we should never forget the general agreement that a person's life should be balanced between his work, leisure and personal and social relationships and responsibilities. Any decision disturbing this balance can have huge impact on the basic tapestry of life.

Let us examine these comments more closely. As per his statement, a person should work 15 hours a day, 6 days a week!!!! Consider the time for your sleep and commuting to work, you are left out with no time in a day for anything else. The question here is what are we - both as an individual and as a nation- going to gain out of this? Will it not turn the employees to a mere machines, eroding them of all their human qualities? What about the high number of women who are working? Do they also have to work for 90 hours a week? Or, are they supposed to sit at home and stare at the blank wall? Do we have to take children into consideration? There can be so many such valid questions and i leave it to the discretion of each reader to raise them and answer them.

Let us get on to the next point. He asks, " how long can a person stare at his wife". By making such a horrendous statement, is he not reducing a WIFE (and thus a WOMAN) to a lifeless object to just stare at? I suppose wife is much more than something to stare at. She is a vital link of the family and thus plays an undeniable role in holding the social fabric together. Even if someone is spending his free time to stare at his wife what is wrong in that? It is high time these highflying managers knew that the wife is not an object to just stare at, but an emotional being to share your life with. And life does not mean your job. These leaders should somewhere register in their super human mind that they are not only responsible to their company, but are equally, if not more, responsible to their family, friends and society.

Today the buzz word is " smart working" and that is not measured by the number of hours a person worked. An employee is evaluated by his efficiency. Forcing someone to work for so many hours is tantamount to slavery. Such a situation will not help the nation to move an inch forward. A business leader will become successful if he or she develops an ecosystem which can nurture and nourish the talents of his team members, rather than sucking out their energy by increasing their working hours.

Researchers have, unequivocally, confirmed that relationship is the most important element for a human being to lead a happy and meaningful life. Health experts’ emphasis on the importance of maintaining a harmonious work-life balance. The new generation, who are extremely talented and efficient, always demand flexibility. Pandemic taught us, beyond all doubts, that hybrid model of working is highly effective.

Blurting out such inhumane and impractical suggestion, while the whole world strive to create a better working atmosphere, shows either lack of fundamental wisdom, or demonstrate unwanted zealousness to prove that the person is more loyal than the company itself.

This, I feel, is another proof that many leaders at the top are still narrow minded, condescending, selfish,  misogynists to some extent and think only about their benefits. They, probably have failed to understand the aspirations and ambitions of the new generations. It is high time they learned more about compassion and human values. They should be wise enough to understand there is nothing wrong in staring at your wife and majority are capable of doing it. They should realize that many of the wives are also working and if both of them are going to spend ninety hours a week at their work then the whole system will collapse. Family is not an enterprise run for the sake of profits. It needs undivided attention of all its members. Allow the family to survive. Let the employees complete their responsibilities at work in a reasonable time, stare at their wives at home and lead a peaceful and meaningful life.

 

---

 

വ്യഥകൾ, വീടൊഴിയുമ്പോൾ

 വ്യഥകൾ

ഇരമ്പിയാർക്കുന്നു മനം

ഒരു വൻ മഴുവെറിഞ്ഞു-

യർത്തുകയതിൽ നിന്നു-

മൊരു വൻകര, ഇടറുന്ന

പതറുന്ന, ഏറെ വഴികൾ താണ്ടി

തളരുന്ന പാദങ്ങളതിൽ

ഒരു വേളയിളവേൽക്കട്ടെ

ഇടയ്ക്കെങ്കിലുമാ പാഴ്മുളം

തണ്ടിലൊരു ഗാനം വൃന്ദാവന-

സാരംഗിയായ് തീർക്കുക

പിരിഞ്ഞു പോയ് നീയെൻ

കരൾ കവർന്നേറെ ദൂരെയെങ്കിലും

ഈ മുരളീരവത്തിൽ തുടിക്കട്ടെ

പാടെ ശൂന്യമാം ഹൃത്തടം

ആകാശമാകെയിരുളുന്ന നേരത്ത്

നാലഞ്ചു വരികളെഴുതുക

നെഞ്ചിൽ നീരേറ്റും ഘനശ്യാമ

മേഘത്തിൻ കൈവശമയക്കുക

യാത്രകളാകെയുപേക്ഷിച്ചൂഷരമായ

വഴികളിലേതോ വസന്തത്തിൻ

 ഓർമകൾ കവിതയായ് പെയ്യട്ടെ

കാമവും മോഹവും പോറ്റി വളർത്തി

കറ പിടിച്ചുടഞ്ഞ ജീവിതം

വയ്യയിനി ശുദ്ധമാക്കുവാൻ അഗ്നിയാൽ

നിൻ നഖമുനയാലീ ഭൂമി പിളർക്കുക

ചെഞ്ചോര ചുവപ്പാർന്ന മണ്ണി-

നടരുകളിൽ അടിഞ്ഞു തീരട്ടെ

നക്ഷത്രത്തിളക്കമൊഴിഞ്ഞയീ ജീവിതം

 2. വീടൊഴിയുമ്പോൾ

വീടൊരു വസ്ത്രം പോലെ

പൊതിയുന്നെന്നെ,യൂരി വെയ്ക്ക-

 ണമിതൊരുനാൾ എത്രമേൽ ഇഷ്ടത്തോടെ

അണിഞ്ഞിരുന്നാലും

രസനയിലെ രസമുകുളങ്ങൾ ഒന്നൊന്നായി കൊഴിയണം

അടുക്കളയിലെ കടുകുവറുത്ത

മണത്തിൽ മനം പുരളണം

കുളിക്കുമ്പോൾ ദേഹത്തടിഞ്ഞ

ചേറ് ഇളക്കാതെയുറയ്ക്കണം

കട്ടിലിൽ തീയായ് പടർന്നത്

കനലായ് ചാരമായ് തീരണം

കാഴ്ച കുറഞ്ഞ മിഴിയിൽ

കലങ്ങിയ കൺമഷിയിൽ

കണ്ണാടി വികൃതമാകണം

ചായങ്ങൾ തുടച്ചരങ്ങൊഴിയണം

അലമാരിയിൽ അടക്കിവെച്ച

പലവർണ വസ്ത്രങ്ങൾ

പാകമല്ലാതാവണം

കുയിലിൻ്റെ നാദം ജാലക വാതിലിൽ തട്ടി തകരണം

പൂവിൻ സുഗന്ധം മുറ്റത്തു തന്നെ പൊഴിയണം

ഊന്നുവടിയൂർന്നു വീഴണം

ഒരു നറുത്തിരി കൊളുത്തുമ്പോൾ

വെളിച്ചമുള്ളിൽ തെളിയണം

പടിവാതിൽ തുറന്നേ കിടപ്പത്

മറ്റൊരു യാത്രയ്ക്കെന്നറിയണം

My Silence

 

My silence is not the sign of a peaceful mind,

It is a dam I have built

When my heart tries to flow out.

My silence is not an acceptance letter,

It is a scabbard, where my words,

As sharp as a sword, are kept safely.

My silence is not a sign of wisdom,

It is the dilemma of the mind

Always confused between- “TO BE OR NOT TO BE”

My silence is not the heart’s whisper

dripping with love,

Rather, It is the silent sobbing of

Those painful memories.

My silence is not due to dryness of mouth

Out of paralyzing fear,

It is the turmoil of mind, not knowing

whom to fight with.

My silence is not a solitary prison

i built myself in,

It is the emptiness of the mind

when deserted by everyone around.

Yet, once in a while my silence drops

Like a word, a dew, a petal,

Unable to carry the pain anymore

As if it is preparing me to listen to

The unheard song of the twilight,

Music of the fluttering butterfly wings,

Melody of those soft foot steps 

Waiting outside my heart to enter.

 

Beedi, Bus stop and Blade

 

 

I am not sure whether these items have become obsolete, but they are surely on the verge of getting extinct.

Beedi

This one can raise a few eye brows. I also admit that there is definitely a gender bias in this.

Beedi was a symbol of manhood during those days. As you enter the fag end of your teens, it is a glowing beedi on your lips which normally define your courageous youth. On top of that it was cost effective, easy to get, handle and hide. At college, we might not have a pen of our own, but would definitely have a couple of beedis in our pocket. I might not have exchanged my text book with my friend but would have easily exchanged a beedi with him. Taking a few puffs, without coughing, shows that you are ready to enter the world of men. Two beedis and a black tea injected enough courage before appearing for any exam Glaring at the infinity through the rings of the smoke also gave you the status of an intellect. Today, thanks to the vigorous health awareness campaigns, smoking as such has reduced. I am also aware of its health hazards and am not recommending it. However, for me those beedis were transformative. Somewhere it changed me from the confused school boy to a more determined young man. Other factors also must have helped, but beedi is definitely one of them. I have quit smoking many years back. But there is no denying the fact that beedi had helped me in defining my masculinity, and at times, when i lose my daring and moral courage to respond to many vices and atrocities around, i miss those beedi days badly.

Bus stop

I know no one will agree if i say bus stops have become obsolete. But i am talking about a different kind of bus stop. Those bus stops were a place with different purposes. They were not a place where you waited for the bus. That is where you met your friends and classmates. The bus stop witnessed the secret rendezvous; the quick glances and deft and sudden exchange of love letters. We spent hours together there, smoking beedis and talking about everything under the sun, but nothing in particular or important. The bus stop was a huge umbrella when it rained. When our beloved councilor died suddenly, we unanimously named the bus stop after him, in spite of the religious and political differences. At the bus stop we waited, without being in a hurry; took life lightly, allowing buses to come and go. We took the bus as we pleased and enjoyed our journey. The bus stop was not just that physical structure, rather it was a threshold between the world we lived and the world we dreamt. It was shelter for us in many ways. I agree we still have bus stops. But today, before we reach the bus stop, the bus arrives and we all are in a hurry to board the bus. Now a days when I see a bus stop, it looks like a skeleton, devoid of flesh, blood, energy and vibrancy of that old shelter.

Blade

The other day dad asked for razor blades and i gave him the use- and- throw one. He was not satisfied. When i tried to get those blades i realized that they are slowly disappearing from our lives. For young men, buying blades heralded their entry into manhood. That does not mean the blade had just one use. It became handy as a nail cutter. For girls, it was a protective weapon against the perverts who were aplenty in buses and crowded places. For political party workers, its deft use can leave a few opponents bleeding. Magicians surprised us by swallowing them. At certain point it slowly started waning out from our lives. New technology ensured its further decline. Even the word blade started getting new meanings. The financial companies which mushroomed were called BLADE companies, since they charged cut-throat interest rates. A guy who is too talkative and distressing is called a Blade as his garrulousness can be extremely injurious. After covid even the saloons are not using blades.Looking back I still have that nostalgic feeling of holding the razor with the blade in it and having the first shave. That was my entry into my youth. Physically I can’t remain as a youth, but youthfulness of those memories can be preserved. Probably i should buy one pack, before it disappears completely, for old times’ sake.